It's time for straight-talkin' and no messin'
Is it time parents across the UK adopted the "Manchester Mindset"? We ask Sarah Knight, founder of Mind The Gap Academy
Alright, paranters?
This week is the first week without both Felice and Sam and I’m missing them tremendously.
If you can support either of them in their future work, please do so.
Follow Sam Lewis on Twitter: @Sam_kelliann10
Follow Felice Southwell on Twitter: @FeliceSouthwell
Also, for the moment, this does mean it’s just little-old-me running the Paranting newsletter1.
While I’ve been writing for over 18 years, I still get so nervous; imposter syndrome.
But anyhow, please do enjoy this week’s edition of the Paranting newsletter and do comment with what you think.
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Sophia x
It’s no secret; I love a good northern story2.
So when I was approached to speak to Sarah Knight about the “Manchester Mindset” I was intrigued3.
Q: Let’s start with the fundamentals. What are you about?
Well then, I’m a 49 year old mum of two not-so-smalls; a 20-year-old and a 16-year-old.
I always start with that because being a mum is what defines me—it’s the job I’m most proud of.
And, for a lot of years, I was doing on my own as my marriage broke into a thousands pieces when the not-so-smalls were small at the ages of 8 and 4.
Being a mum is also the reason I ended up with my own business. I was working in senior management in a corporate career in communications for a company that had just floated on the market for a gazillion pounds and I was up-the-duff with the now 20-year-old.
I was starting to finally believe I was pregnant (and not just a mound of vanilla slices!) when the company I was working for—and who I had in fact just written the maternity policy for—went bump, as the market crashed.
It was a pretty shite time as I had to make a huge team of people redundant, make myself redundant and then wonder “how the feck I was going to manage?” I was the breadwinner at home and it wasn’t an option to put my feet up and read all of the glossy magazines while having time to rest before a baby came along.
So after going to the local job centre and them suggesting I go on disability benefits (it was 20 years ago) I rang round lots of old contacts and waddled into offices selling my wares.
And not one person could or would offer me a job. I was told to come back when I had pushed the baby out and was ready for the world of work again.
So I just set up on my own, with no business plan, no grand strategic plan, no real idea as to how I was going to make it all work. I just had the knowledge that I had to do something and had to crack on and earn some money. I got work, some great friends and contacts gave me stuff and the mortgage was paid and the bump got bigger.
Izzy, the 20-year-old, decided to spring a surprise nearly four weeks early (no ante-natal classes for me) and I was working on an event six weeks later. My mum sat outside in the car with the daughter and I ran the event and popped out when my boobs started leaking. And I mainly didn’t sleep because Izzy really didn’t like sleeping.
That was the start of a business that is now just over 20-years-old. It has ebbed and flowed, it has shit years and it’s had years when I’ve felt like a proper grown up nailing life. It’s evolved from a communications consultancy, to working and building teams in organisations providing them with business consultancy and helping them to drive their businesses forward.
And today, armed with the knowledge that what I really like is people and a love of the science behind our behaviours, I work in the world of leadership development, of building and growing businesses and crucially looking at how our mindset is the cornerstone to success.
Mind The Gap Business Academy launched in 2020 and I’ve finally found what I really love—it’s taken 20 years of sometimes-turning-right-instead-of-left to get here today.
Then… six years ago one of my best friends died from breast cancer.
It was crap.
While she was alive we planned and arranged her celebration of life and that has undoubtedly shaped how I think, feel and act. My friend going to sit on her cloud began my “fuck it years” where I just said yes to stuff, which resulted in a trip to Marbella, a trip to Chamonix and meeting my current (and final!) husband.
It also led to my determination to simply crack on and enjoy this thing called life because we only get one and we need to make it count.
Q: Tell us more about the Manchester Mindset? What does this mean?
The Manchester Mindset is practical; straight-talking; it’s no messing.
It’s about cracking on with the right tools, being realistic with our goals and of course, it’s a little bit sweary at times too (… well a lot sweary).
In fact some of my friends’ kids call me “Aunty Swearer.”4
Many business owners, both male and female, take their businesses so seriously. I watch them becoming almost cartoon corporate characters—but if you simply inject a bit of humour, honesty and realism into what you do, then everything gets a bit easier.
And it’s about making it easy for ourselves—not getting wrapped up in all of the big words and corporate nonsense.
It’s about being real, true and just doing it.
We can’t take ourselves too seriously. Yes we can be focused, passionate and dedicated to what we are doing, but let’s get a grip; in the main we’re not usually saving lives on a day-to-day basis and it’s good to remind ourselves of this when overwhelm at work sets in.
And then it’s about understanding that the good work starts with us and taking responsibility for it. Not waiting for someone else to come and save the day, not playing the “woe is me” card, it’s about looking at what you really want and taking the steps to go and get it—because no other bugger is going to do that for you.
Finally, it’s about your community, your cheerleaders, the people you have around you. Because sometimes when you can’t kick yourself up the arse, you need someone to do it for it.
The Manchester Mindset is something that I’ve coined because ultimately it’s something I have identified with and it’s the approach that has got and kept me on this journey for the last 20 years.
And is the central cog of my new online training and business coaching course— Press Play Live.
Q: How can paranters apply the Manchester Mindset to their lives and jobs?
Do one thing today. Write it down and action it.
The sense of achievement of doing that one thing will help you go and do another thing.
Do something you love and have a laugh.
When something goes tits up—whether that’s with your kids, your relationship or work—just press pause, reflect and fail forwards.
Learn from what you’ve done. I am who I am today because of what happened yesterday and the day before—and I have a choice about what I do today because that forms who I am tomorrow. It’s in our control.
And—take responsibility for who you are as both a parent and an individual, what you are doing and own it. Be you, don’t apologise for who you are—and know that to go forwards you simply have to take one step and crack the feck on.
Q: What's your parant?
Mivets!5
When the kids ask me what’s for tea—which they still do—I simply say “Mivets.”
We all know what that means; I have no clue what we’re having for tea and I frankly can’t be arsed thinking about it, so it’s going to be some sort of “picnic dinner” cobbled together with stuff probably near its sell-by-date in the fridge.
Oh, and get a lock on the bathroom door—it’s the only way to pee in peace.
But put it high up or one of your smalls could lock themselves in, which means you’ll need to break the door down (true story).
For further information on Sarah’s business, visit mindthegap.academy or follow Sarah herself at instagram.com/mindthegap.academy
Glup!
Among the utter bullshit of “levelling up”, the importance of everything above Watford gets lost, especially the further up you go.
Not gonna lie; I assumed she meant “be more like Liam Gallagher.”
This will also be my new nickname.
I am totally taking Sarah’s word on this; I’ve never heard of this before and Google was no help. If it helps, I trust her ‘coz my home city has some unknown slang too.