The Boris Johnson kettle crisis

Or "Other ways we can make short-term sacrifices for long term happiness"

This week, Prime Minister Boris Johnson gave a speech about investing in nuclear power and decided it would be a great time to utter the words “electricity bills.”¹

Of course, the country did not like it². And it wasn’t because we all know decent kettles cost more than £20…

Every person when Prime Minister Boris Johnson mentioned energy bills. Photo by Yogendra Singh on Unsplash

While it was seemingly taken out of context by many - BoJoke was comparing a £20 kettle saving a tenner a year on your energy bills to investing in nuclear energy - it wasn’t lost on people that the analogy was… in bad taste.

But this outrage and media commentary got me pondering one morning while showering³; what stuff could we actually do that would actually make some sort of dent in our energy bills?

Don’t pay council tax instead of buying a £20 kettle

Bear with me…! Council tax - which is based on how much your house would have sold for in 1991⁴ - is at an all time high.

If you have a Band D - the middle band - house, you’ll be paying £1,966 per year.

Now imagine, for the sake of playing BoJoke’s game, if we invested the money into our £3,500 energy bills instead of paying Council Tax.

Yes, councils would lose out on our money in the short term, but in the long term you’d hope that energy prices would go down and we can start paying it again.

Short-term expense for long-term gain, right?

But in all seriousness, Council Tax is one of the cruellest taxes we have to pay. Not because the money seems to disappear into some ether⁵ (which is bad enough).

It’s because of the treatment people receive when they can’t pay it. Threats of being taken to court after (sometimes just one) missed payments and no recovery direct debit, so the onus falls on you to chase them to make the payment.

It’s one of the most stressful payments to make (or miss).

So perhaps we could save our own sanity a bit and not pay it for a year. That’ll make a sizable dent in our energy bills.

Let’s stop paying child care fees

Okay, so I’m not the biggest fan of this one because it’s not really the government that suffers, but the child care providers.

But, again, the cost of sending your cherub to be looked after when you labour away at work could really be better spent on those £3,500 energy bills.

It costs over £7,000 on average a year to put a child into childcare provision⁶. Let’s face it; we could write off half of that and pay off the energy bills.

I’m sure BoJoke sees the advantage of subsidising half our costs for a year or two⁷ - short term expense for long term gain, am I right?

Just don’t pay your energy bills

I know what you’re thinking: “I need to pay my bills or I’ll be cut off.”

This is absolutely the case for those who are on pre-payment meters, which just so happen to be people who have low incomes.

However, people who pay via direct debits have a bit more leverage with the energy companies. And the grassroots movement, Don’t Pay, has rightly pointed out that mass organisation across the country - like with the Poll Tax⁸ - could actually make a difference. Show Ofgem and the energy companies we mean business.

Or, you know, afford to eat from October.

So consider cancelling your direct debit on 1 October if you really want to stick it to the energy man.

Again, it’s like BoJoke alluded to with his £20 kettle; short term sacrifice = long term gains.

1. He probably wasn’t thinking… or the person who wrote his speech.

2. My Instagram and Twitter feeds were not happy.

3. Where your best ideas happen!

4. Honestly, my house wasn’t even around in 2011, never mind 1991.

5. Pot holes that never get filled in, anyone?

6. An under 2, going 25 hours a week. Not even full time!

7. Or forever… I’m not fussy.

8. I mean, it’s basically Council Tax… but meaner?